The Booze of Monkey Island Walkthrough
The Booze of Monkey Island takes an enjoyable couple of hours to play through fully, with much of that time being spent in conversation. If you ain't got time for that, this walkthrough will allow you to blast through it in a fraction of the time - but be warned, without those conversations there isn't much game left, and you'll have no idea why you're doing what you're doing! With that warning out of the way, let's go.
Arrival on Booty Island
We join Guybrush trapped aboard ship off the coast of Booty Island. Follow the brief tutorial, pick up the lard from the barrel and use it on the porthole to escape.
Use the cannon to knock it over and grab the gunpowder that spills out. Look in the trash barrel to get a mask. Head towards the right and walk into the Thimble Bar.
Grab Sax the monkey. Over to the right of the screen, pick up some firewood. Open the oven door and use the firewood with the fire to get a handy mass of flames - completely safe to carry around. Grab some more firewood.
Talk to Ignatius Cheese. You should soon get a mug, a meal voucher for sticky pudding and a mission: recruit three paying customers for the bar.
Give the meal voucher straight back to I. Cheese to get a sticky pudding. Now you can leave the bar.
Head all the way to the right to go "to the stage". Wait for Wally the cartographer to put his pen down ("Wally's nib") and then pick it up. We'll use that later.
Recruiting William
Head off to the right, "to the island". Go to the governor's mansion.
Pick up the flowers, the fallen festoon and the rake, then head back to the island. Next visit the big tree.
Pick up the paper sheets and the turnip. Give the pen to William to earn yourself a poem.
Use the rake with the vegetable garden, then use Sax with the garden too. While William the Swiss is incapacitated: use the firewood with the tree holes, use the sticky pudding with the trunk, and use the gunpowder with the sticky stain. If you run out of time before William comes back to his senses, you can go back to the bar, grab Sax again and have another go.
Pick up the clothespin William has dropped on the ground. Just one thing left to convince him that the tree is dying: go back to the governor's mansion and use his horrible poem on the door.
Speak to William. Point out that the tree is dead. He'll agree - that's your first customer recruited.
Recruiting Wally
Go back to the stage area and speak to Kate. Ask her if she's thirsty, learning of her love of Near-Grog. Ask her for a flyer. Ask her what she's doing here, ask her "about the cartography contest", then ask if you can enter the contest. Once you have the flyer and the certificate of attendance, you can end the conversation.
Time for some mapmaking: use the "nib" with the stack of paper, use the sticky pudding with the stack of scribbled sheets, then use the festoon with the scribbled scroll.
Give the completed map to Wally to begin the contest. Choose whatever options you like - with Kate's help, you will win.
Wally is looking miserable. Arson will solve his problems, Use the flaming mass from your inventory with his map. Another customer for the bar!
Recruiting Kate
Walk off the screen to the left, use the mask to wear it, then return to the stage area. Speak to Kate, introducing yourself any way you like, and ask to take a cruise. You'll end up back on the map. Return to pick up Kate's dropped hairband.
Head back to the bar. Give the turnip to I. Cheese to obtain a pink drink. Speak to I. Cheese and ask for his help to persuade someone to come in. Say you're talking about Kate, then suggest you could give her real grog disguised as Near-Grog. You'll receive a bottle of real grog.
Take the grog to the big tree and use it with the barrel of rotten vegetables. Combine the hairband and the flowers in your inventory. Now you can use several things with the bottle of grog to disguise it: the pen, the flower wreath and the pink drink.
Take the fake Near-Grog to the bar and give it to Cheese. He'll reject it. Give him the clothespin and he'll change his mind. You've got another customer!
To the Rock of Gelato!
Speak to Cheese and tell him it's time to fulfill his side of the deal. Say "oh, did you mean, 'they have to pay using money'?". Convince him that all three of his customers deserve punishment. Tell him you'll get another three customers - and that's all it takes. The end.